This man discovered the most painful way to take a “break” from sex.
A frisky UK fellow reportedly made medical — and sexual — history after accidentally snapping his penis lengthwise during a disastrous session in the sack.
“We present the first documented case of a vertical penile fracture … sustained by a 40-year-old man during sexual intercourse,” reads the groundbreaking case study published this week in the British Medical Journal.
Medics report that the anonymous romper’s “penis buckled against his partner’s perineum” — the region between the anus and genitals — due to what they can only surmise was an ill-timed thrust.
Specifically, he suffered a broken penis, which occurs when one ruptures the “rubbery sheath of tissue below the skin that allows the penis to increase in width and length to produce a firm erection,” according to Healthline.
As the injury generally happens when the member is at full mast, it often feels like a broken bone (so to speak) to the injured party, experts reported.
Per the study, “up to 88.5% of penile fractures occur during sexual intercourse, with a 20-year retrospective study concluding ‘doggy style’ and ‘man on top’ as the two main” sexual positions that endanger penises.
However, this new patient’s case was particularly unusual as he experienced only minor swelling and not the “popping” sound, rolling of the skin and other symptoms normally associated with phallic fractures.
His erection also faded gradually unlike most sufferers, whose phalluses go flaccid immediately after the snap.
Indeed, subsequent MRI scans showed that the man’s penis had a 3-centimeter-long vertical tear — rather than the more common horizontal variety — along the right side of the shaft.
Despite the unconventional nature of the fracture, surgeons were forced to treat the patient’s mangled manhood within 24 hours to prevent complications such as permanent erectile dysfunction, researchers reported.
Thankfully, the erect-tive surgery went off without a hitch. The man fully recovered and was able to have hanky-panky — hopefully with better aim — a mere six months after his fateful fling.
Not only that but he was able to achieve “erections of the same quality to those prior to the injury, denying any penile curvature or significant palpable scarring.”
However, more research is needed before scientists can confidently determine whether vertical penis fractures “alter either the presentation or long-term outcomes following operative repair.”
This isn’t the first time someone’s wounded their willy in the boudoir. In 2019, a randy man snapped his member clean in half while getting jiggy with his girlfriend. Meanwhile, another man with a broken penis the same year found his member calcifying into “bone” afterward.