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Every relationship has ups and downs. It’s normal to hit some rough patches during a long term relationship. However, any relationship where you feel frightened, depressed and just not good enough is a relationship that needs some serious thought.

A relationship should make you feel happy and excited about all the possibilities ahead of you. Here are 8 things you should never have to tolerate in a relationship.

8. NegativityImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/354799276877651092/

While you may experience negativity from a partner who is going through hard times (loss of a family member, unemployment), it shouldn’t damage your relationship in the long run. However, a partner who is negative and miserable most of the time for no real reason will drag you down with them.

You will start to feel negative all the time and will get into a vicious cycle of playing the blame game with your partner. This is will cause a downward spiral in your relationship where no one is happy. Don’t ever settle for someone who makes life negative instead of fun and inspiring.

7. IrresponsibilityImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/563794447085297035/

Never pick a partner who is incapable of taking care of themselves. While such traits may seem goofy and endearing at first, they quickly become annoying and frustrating. Your partner should have a basic sense of responsibility and enough maturity to hold down a job, pay their bills and just manage his/her life properly.

6. Emotional UnavailabilityImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/9640586679114984/

Your partner should be emotionally available; otherwise, you won’t be able to have a close and genuine relationship with them. If they feel insecure or shy about displaying emotions and revealing any kind of vulnerability, they probably have issues to work out before they can function in a healthy relationship.

5. insecurity

An insecure partner can make you feel like you are suffocating in the relationship. Feeling wanted and needed in a relationship can be great, but a clingy, needy partner is not normal. A partner who can’t function at all without you is a huge red flag, and their insecurity must be addressed for the relationship to thrive and continue.

. Never coming firstImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/256212666273997445/

You and your relationship should always be a priority for your partner. While situations may arise where they have other things to consider, they should always consider your needs and feelings. If they don’t tell you their plans, see how you are doing or put others before you, it is a sign that they don’t think of you as a priority. And in a relationship, you should never be an afterthought.

3. Controlling behaviorImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/484488872387956520/

No matter how close you are, your partner should never control who you see or what you wear or do. This kind of behavior shows immaturity and a lack of trust in you. Controlling, manipulative behavior is toxic and should never be tolerated. Also controlling behavior can quickly evolve to emotional and even physical abuse, making it a gigantic red flag you should be aware off.

2. Disrespectful languageImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/362187995016826898/

Your partner should never belittle you or curse at you. This shows a lack of respect on their part. Even if you are in the middle of a heated argument, your partner can’t disrespect you with foul language just because they can’t control themselves.

1. A breach of trustImage Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/302233824975679062/

Mutual trust is the foundation for every relationship. If you find that you can’t trust your partner, you should talk to them or end things immediately. Both partners need to trust each other and be open about any issues in order to make the relationship work.