Most of us want to know what is it that makes a marriage last — that elusive answer to the difference between getting married … and staying happily married forever (or, at least, until death do you part).
While everyone seems to have their own personal antidotes and advice about what makes some marriages great, one of the threads weaving them all together is that there are certain personality traits some men and women possess that make all the difference in the world.
The personal qualities and characteristics I’m referring to bring out the strengths in both husband and wife, creating the kind of loving, healthy marriage that makes it through the long haul, regardless of life’s inevitable ups and downs.
If you want to be happily married, look for someone with these 5 dominant personality traits, as they’re the people most likely to have the kind of marriage that lasts forever.
People with these 5 personality traits are most likely to stay married forever:
1. Responsible
When most people hear that word they think of being responsible for the functional things, such as keeping a job or picking up after themselves. This is not where this trait shows its biggest advantage.
It is being responsible in ways that promote well-being in the relationship — understanding that they are 100 percent responsible for their actions and their outcomes.
A responsible partner also understands that they are responsible for their happiness, so they’re not dependent on their partner to fulfill them.
This was huge for a client of mine whose husband worked out of town. She didn’t function well when he was gone and would get angry and come unglued if he didn’t call when she thought he should.
She said it would ruin her whole day. She was blaming him for her being unhappy and not taking responsibility for her happiness and perceptions when he wasn’t able to call.
2. Positive
When a partner can respond positively to their partner, this can be a game changer.
Having a positive response means that when a request is made, the person being asked looks to see what they can say yes to instead of an instant, “No. That won’t work.”
Focusing on the positive characteristics of your partner can change your entire view of the marriage itself.
3. Accepting
Acceptance enhances the feelings of safety between two people in a relationship. A person who is accepting is going to be able to accept differences and not be triggered when their partner thinks differently than they do.
An accepting person allows their partner to be completely honest and open and to share their wildest dreams without fear of rejection.
Being accepting would also include being willing to forgive and being willing to give and receive repair attempts during a conflict and not being attached to a specific outcome.
A friend told me a story of a woman she knew who was upset at her husband for spending too much time on his hobby. He attempted to make her happy by cooking her a romantic dinner. All she wanted was for him to give up his hobby and walk out on his dinner invitation. It is important to accept our partner for their efforts and she missed this great opportunity.
4. Nurturing
A partner who nurtures our body, mind, and spirit is always working toward what is best for the relationship.
A nurturing partner cares about their partner’s personal growth and will be their hero to love and support them, no matter what.
They will not only nurture their partner but agreements that have been made and the commitment to the marriage.
They will be great parents and honor family members as well.
5. Adventurous
While climbing mountains or sailing off into the sunset are a lot of fun and fun is certainly an important trait of a marriage, being adventurous is just as much about making your marriage your greatest adventure.
An adventurous partner will be open to bigger possibilities in all areas of life.
That partner will be able to stretch out of their comfort zone and explore all options that can make their partner happy. Whether it is sharing each other’s darkest secrets or surprising them in creative romantic ways.
Just think what this trait can do for the love life!
Whether you are looking for that perfect partner who has what it takes to keep a marriage going strong forever or for ways to hone these traits in yourself to have the marriage of your dreams, consider these combined personality traits the key to happily ever after.
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