Couple

1. When you have a crush on someone even after being in a serious relationship

When you are in a committed and serious relationship, the last thing you want in life is to feel attracted to someone other than your partner. But we don’t have control over our emotions, do we? There might come a moment in your relationship when someone else might make you feel special. Maybe, spending a little extra time with a colleague might make you feel like a college-going girl. Or you might want to take that attractive girl in your gym out for a coffee date. Sometimes, such emotions are inevitable but when we are in a relationship, it makes us feel vulnerable or guilty. So, what should you do when you have a crush on a third person even after making a commitment to your partner for a lifetime? Here are a few things you can follow that will help to keep your emotions under control.

2. Treat it like a secret

Do you know what’s the best thing about an infatuation? It wears off after a while. But it can make you feel guilty while it lasts and the temptation to tell about it to someone, especially the partner, is great. But in most cases people unburden their guilty for selfish reasons because telling your partner about your crush will only make him or her suffer from a newfound sense of doubt while you will enjoy your moments of relief. But is it really worth talking about emotions which will probably wear off slowly and you would not even think twice about it? So, do yourself and your partner a favour and keep it to yourself!

3. Treat it like a wake-up call

Crushing on someone can be an indication of some missing ingredients in your relationship. Don’t be alarmed thinking it means your relationship is nearing its end. Maybe, you are looking for some excitement because your current relationship is going through a monotonous phase. Or the emotional connection you have with your partner is slowly dwindling. Whatever might be the reason, use this as an opportunity to address the issues in your existing relationship.

4. Use it as a motivator

Just think about the days when you first fell in love. Didn’t it make you take better care of yourself like dressing up for the special someone or wearing a nice perfume so that he or she notices you? Didn’t it make you feel happy? Same is the case when you have a crush on someone. You would want to get noticed and thereby start doing things, which you did only when you were in the initial days of your relationship. Take this as a motivator to bring back the good old days of self-care, confidence and motivation.

5. It’s important to set boundaries

Having a crush on someone is different from having an affair with him. Infatuation and attraction are harmless until you get emotionally or physically involved with the person. That is why it is very important to set some boundaries. In case you end up dating the person or spending more time than necessary with him or her, it will mean you are making emotional investments on a third person. You don’t want to do that, right?

6. Give it time

Infatuation wears off with time. So, it’s wise to wait and watch instead of acting on an impulse. It’s no use spending your energy and feelings on something, which is only momentary. Whenever you are overwhelmed by emotions and are on the verge of doing something you might end up repenting later, just ask yourself this question—is it worth breaking the trust of your partner? So, take your time to let the emotions cool down and meanwhile concentrate on the relationship you have built with the person with whom you are truly in love.

TNN/timesofindia.indiatimes.com